Master Mantak Chia has a habit of answering questions about male sexuality by talking about women. In this clip from his November 2019 London Real interview, Brian Rose asks how many orgasms men should have, and Chia turns the conversation straight to female pleasure, which in Taoist teaching comes first.
It’s frank, often funny, and full of old Taoist imagery. Here is a guide to what he says.
▶ Watch the full episode: Mantak Chia – How To Become A Sexual Master
“Ladies first”
Chia’s starting point is that a man’s first job is to make sure his partner reaches orgasm first. Taoist texts, he says, talk about “three waters”: the idea that a woman can climax several times. He contrasts the sexes in energy terms. A woman releases one egg a month, he says, while a man produces hundreds of millions of sperm, so in his view men lose far more energy through ejaculation. That is the root of his teaching on male control.
He tells the story of the sperm’s journey with some relish, and a joke: of all those millions, only “the smart ones” make it, “you and me.”
The three gates
Brian asks about the “three gates” Chia teaches. This clip covers the first: the clitoris. Chia points out that it plays no part in reproduction, which is why, he says, some cultures have tried to remove it. Its purpose, as he puts it, is pleasure. He also stresses that what most people see is only the tip of a much larger structure.
The tofu exercise
The clip’s most famous moment is a training exercise he says comes from old Taoist practice. Practitioners would stack three layers of soft tofu and practise transmitting vibration through it with a fingertip, without breaking it. The point, he explains, is learning sensitivity and control. Brian asks whether he still recommends tofu. Chia laughs and says people can at least train themselves.
Not just about the penis
Brian sums up what surprised him: two of the three gates have little to do with the penis at all. Reaching the first gate takes hands, mouths, patience and training. Chia agrees, and adds that the second gate will come in part two.
Fire and water
The clip ends with the image Chia uses most. Man, he says, is like fire: aroused in a moment and finished just as fast. Woman is like water, which needs time to boil. If a man rushes, the fire meets cold water and is quickly over. If he is patient and lets her warm up first, both have more pleasure and he has more control. “Water needs time to boil,” he says.
What to take from it
Strip away the colourful imagery, and Chia’s message is one most relationship experts would recognise: slow down, pay attention to your partner, and treat intimacy as a skill that can be learned. Some of his biological explanations are his own Taoist framing rather than medical fact, so take those as part of the tradition rather than science.
This clip reflects Mantak Chia’s Taoist teaching. It is not medical advice.
Who is Master Mantak Chia?
Mantak Chia is a Thai-born Taoist master, teacher and author, and the founder of the Universal Healing Tao system. He has written dozens of books on Taoist practice, including qigong, meditation and the cultivation of sexual energy, and he runs the Tao Garden retreat in northern Thailand.
In the full 2019 episode, he talks with Brian Rose about the male multiple orgasm, sexual energy and Taoist health practices. You can also watch his most popular clip: Master Mantak Chia – Sexual Exercises For Men.
See everything Mantak Chia has done with London Real on his guest page: Master Mantak Chia on London Real.
More on London Real
Transcript
Transcript: Master Mantak Chia – How To Master The Vagina (Part 1): Taoist Advice On Female Pleasure
0:00 Brian Rose: How many orgasms should men have?
0:03 Mantak Chia: It depends how you train. But when you make love, you need to get the lady to ejaculate first. That is a major part. The Tao talks about three waters: the lady can have at least three ejaculations. Because a lady has only one egg a month. She has the fluid, from what they call the Skene gland, but that fluid is mostly just water. So the lady does not lose too much energy, because there is only one egg.
1:04 Mantak Chia: But men need to prepare 100 million, 200 million sperm. That much! Because when the man ejaculates into the vagina, the vagina decides to kill sperm. 180 million die immediately, because of all the acid inside. And you have 20 million left. Those 20 million have to walk through the dead bodies. Then when they enter, it’s a big maze again, and they get lost. The stupid ones get lost. Only the smart ones are left: you and me. We made it.
1:57 Brian Rose: We made it. So you talk about the female orgasm, because the man needs to prepare the female to continue having multiple orgasms. Talk about women. They have the three gates, right?
2:09 Mantak Chia: Yes. For a woman, the first gate is the clit, the clitoris. In some tribes in Africa they think the lady doesn’t need the clit, so they cut it off. Because the clit has nothing to do with having a baby. So they think, why do you need it? But why does a lady need to have orgasm and feel good? That gland is only for fun, for arousal, to feel good. It’s for playing. The clit is not in the vagina, it’s on top of it. And the legs of it also go around the lips, so it’s quite big, but we only see the tip of it.
3:18 Mantak Chia: So the Tao says you need to work with it. In the olden times they used tofu.
3:25 Brian Rose: Tofu?
3:26 Mantak Chia: Yes. Because it’s a very sensitive part. They buy soft tofu, three layers, and you put your finger on it, and you need to train. If you don’t get the vibration enough to go right through it…
3:45 Brian Rose: Through the tofu?
3:46 Mantak Chia: Through the tofu. Then you cannot reach the clit and the lips around it. So when you’re on the tofu, you start to vibrate and train the vibration, and the vibration goes through. And if the vibration goes through enough, the lady ejaculates.
4:11 Brian Rose: Do you still recommend tofu?
4:15 Mantak Chia: They can at least train themselves. Tofu is so good, it’s so soft. And if you break the tofu, the lady says, “Don’t touch me.”
4:30 Brian Rose: I was surprised, because with two of the three gates, and we’ll talk about the second gate next, the penis can’t do anything. You think the male and female sexual organs go together and it’s that simple, but it’s not. To hit the first gate you need fingers and tongues, and tofu. And devices, maybe.
4:52 Mantak Chia: Training.
4:56 Mantak Chia: Because for the first gate, the Tao says you have to be patient and compassionate. Patient means you have to work with the clit, and sometimes it can take a while. When you’re hugging and kissing, the penis is already erect, and the man always wants to penetrate immediately. The Tao says: listen, the woman is like water. She’s not ready yet. Water needs time to boil. Man is like fire: boom, burn, erect, and you go.
5:32 Mantak Chia: So in the beginning, if you put the fire in the water, very quickly you finish. The Tao says, if you prepare the lady to ejaculate first, now the lady is starting to boil. And when you start to make love, the lady is boiling already. Now you have less arousal and you have more control, because the lady has already ejaculated, and now it’s easier for the lady.
